It's SADD...

For all those women that scrap...

Do you also suffer from temporary loss of memory or gaps in your timelines?

Finally a diagnosis was made for your problems

It is called S.A.D.D. or:

Scrapbook Attention Deficit Disorder

Symptoms:

• You get to the car to go to the scrapbook store, but you look at the car and decide that the car needs to be washed, so you go back to the house to get a bucket of water and soap
• Upon entering the house you see the mail on the floor
• Ok, you will get the water, but first lets sort out the post
• You put the carkeys on your desk, sort the leaflets from the post and see that the wastebasket is full
• So you put the remainders of the post (including some bills) on your desk and take out the trash
• Oh No ! first let's pay those bills...
• Where are those tranfer-forms?
• O....K.... Only 1 left....
• AH! The spare forms are in the top draw upstairs!
• He, your Coke is still standing there on the desk...
• First get those spare forms.
• Just to be on the save side lets put that glass away from the computer before knocking it over the keyboard...
• You know, let's put the glass in the fridge to keep it fresh
• You walk into the kitchen and notice the plants are rather dry, they need water desperately
• You place your glass of Coke on the sink, and guess what... there are you sunglasses!!!
• You have been searching for them all morning!
• Let's put them away before you forget
• Fill up the watering can and head for the flower pots
• Aaaargh!Someone left the TV-remote in the kitchen.When you will be watching TV tonight, no one will be checking the kitchen, so you will bring it to the living room at once!
• You pour some water on the plants, spill on the floor, drop the remote on a pillow of the chair and head back to the hallway.

What where you doing???

At the end of the day:

The car is not washed, the bills have not been paid, the glass of Coke is still out on the sink, the flower never got enough water, you still have only 1 tranfer form and you cannot find your carkeys....

You are trying to figure out why nothing happened today.

You have no clue, you were busy all day!

You are aware that you have a serious problem and need professional help soon, but first you come and check my blog...
And here you read this message, and you sigh in recognition...

IT HAS A NAME!

Scrapbook Attention Deficit Disorder

B.U.B.B.A.H. (Before Unpacking Best Be At Home)

Ca$h In The Attic

Ever heard of the BBC (UK) program "Cash In The Attic"? People need money for a project (like a daughter's weddingdress or driver's license), that needs to be found in no longer used objects stored (for example) in the attic... Which is later on auctioned...

Now as you know my wife always needs money to buy new scrapbook supplies, hardware or whatever can be found in scrapbook stores or wholesellers...

Guess what I found during clearing out the attic???


I wonder how long this "stash" is gonna last...

BTW. Thanks to my "FRIEND" Henk for the picture!

BubBAH!

Another one...

I got so much nice responses on my joke the other day (NOT) that I could not let you go into the weekend without at least a smurk on your faces...

Me and a friend were having some brewskies, talking about marriage the other day and how to treat your wives: "Mine does whatever I tell her to" I told my friend "For example yesterday, I called out: Bring me hot water... NOW! And she brought it to me without objecting..."

"Man what a dictator can you be!" said my friend.

I told him: "You got to look at this differently: I hate to do the dishes with cold water!"

Sorry about the short post, but I gotta go iron some stuff...
Have a nice weekend!
BubbaH!

Grandmother

You all have/had them... Grandparents that have to have every picture of their grandchildren ever taken! And what do they do with them? There are those that keep them in shoeboxes, there are are those that put them in frames and show them off to (whatever is left of) their friends... And ofcourse you have those that SCRAP!!! That's the worst lot!!! I sometimes see them when they come over to do a workshop at my wife's... Man you never know I could move this fast!!!

But enuff of the complaining... here's a (customized) joke about old ladies that scrap!

An old lady went to the store to buy some "Granddaughter" paper for her Layout. Upon reaching the check-out, the clerk told her "I'm sorry ma'am, but the store manager heard that many old ladies make layouts for others, while they have no granddaughter themselves. We now have a policy - if you want to buy "Granddaughter" paper, you have to show us your granddaughter."

Annoyed, the lady went home, got her lovely granddaughter Maggie, and returned to the store, where they sold her the paper without question.

The next week, she returned to the store to buy "Grandson" paper. Again, she's reproached by the cashier: "I'm sorry ma'am, but the store manager heard that many old ladies make layouts for others, while they have no grandson themselves. We now have a policy - if you want "Grandson" paper, you have to show us your grandson."

Frustrated, the woman stormed home, retrieved her precious grandson Graham and returned to the store, where she was sold her "Grandson" paper without further incident.

The next week, the woman returned to the store and strode right up to the cashier with a box in her hand.

"Put your hand in this box," she told the puzzled clerk.

"What's in it?" the clerk asked.

"Just put your hand in here," the lady said.

"No, there's probably something in there that will bite me"

"Nothing will bite you, I promise."

Reluctantly, the clerk put her hand in the box, felt the contents, pulled them out to examine them and let out a scream. Smiling, the old lady asked "now, may I please buy some "toilet" paper?"

BubbaHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Women vs. Children

I assume I am not the only concerned father here, but...

How come I have to tell my children to be careful when drawing with filttips, glueing and such...
While she gets to tinker with ink without even being warned...

LIFE IS SO UNFAIR!

And to make matter worst... She invites other women to join in the making of mess on my diner-table! Does she warn them? NO!!! She even encourages them to experiment with all the stuff she puts outs!

This should make you smile to start your weekend!

Q: What's the difference between a Scrapper and God ?
A: God doesn't think he's a Scrapper.

Q: What's the difference between a Scrapper and a pizza ?
A: A pizza can feed a family of four.

BubbAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

DigiScrap

Have you noticed that your wife spends more and more hours behind the computer screen lately? Has she started talking about digi-scrapping?

REMEMBER: to every con there is a pro: when she starts scrapping Digitally, she no longer has the need for a scraproom, to stuff all those scrapbook articles... She can now store them on the computer!!!

Does that mean she now needs a computer room???

I remember when I wanted to have the computer in the livingroom, she was the one that made me choose between her and the computer... She still has the pictures of me packing!!!

BubbaH! (packed for the weekend)... Or should she be packing for the DT-meeting (not in my house this time)???

Marriage Epiphany

The epiphany (revelation) of marriage also means that there is no more I... She always tells people "WE are going to build... WE are buying... WE go...". Does that mean she is going to give me a hand during reconstruction on HER scraproom? NO! Does that mean I got to say something about buying a new couch? NO! It's just ROYAL PLURAL! (Ever hear a king/queen talk about "I"?)


Talkin' about that scraproom... I slowed down the process by doing 1 thing at a time...

Have a nice weekend!

BuBBAh!

Scrap a piece of me...

You've all seen the tools they use... I even showed you what they can do to a pair of flipflops... But do you also know that they actually abuse the embellishments and stuff on themselves?

You want examples, you say? OK! I hope you got a strong stomach

How about Emily Falconbridge touching her hair while scrapping... with acid-free glue?

Or Vivian Bonder using the book ring to pimp her nose?

Maybe Celine Navarro sat too close (with her lower lip) to the piece she was working on when she decided to add brads?

And what 'bout eyelet (0r should we say EARlets) check out Silje Roe Hagland's ears...

And what about the rubons she used? Or her hair: let me count the ways to use Dabbers... Someone could have told her: Enough...

And ofcourse there is Wes Thomsen... He does not only use the rubons in an "unusual" way, he also has a rather strange way to use spikes...

But hey... Everyone their own kick... Hence the cartoon featuring me!!!

BubbaHaHaHaHaHaH!

Wannabe

The Netherlands and New Zealand have a TV-show called "So you wannabe a Popstar"... I guess that these people need the most punishment!!! And believe me when I say punishment...

For those of you that don't know the show: A bunch of celebrities does a song contest... while the majority (to put it mildly) cannot sing...

So for all those women that need to scrap and get published and give workshops abroad and so on...

Have a great weekend!!!

BubbaH!

ABC

Ever get tired of hearing them talk in terms you never know what the heck they mean???

I am creating a list with terms that not only have a meaning to them, but also to us!!!

To make things clear, I created this cartoon...

The list is somewhere around (I suspect her), I will place it here asap...

BubbaH!!!

Buy Nothing Day

Hey, How was your weekend?

Mine was busy... Saturday she had to shop with a couple of her scrapping friends at the wholeseller...While I had to go to swimming lessons with Michael (and Colin had to tag along) and do the shopping... In the afternoon a scrapping friend came over with husband & kid (luckely he is a friend of mine)...

Sunday! She had to go to some workshop by Dawn Inskip... Brought home some stuff... Really thought she had enuff! Me & the Boys had a lazy sunday... them in their PJ's and playing games on the Vtech or PC... Even dragged me in to help them out every once in a while...

Monday she cleaned out part of the attic that was stocked with stuff that can be used to scrap, but just sat there collecting dust...

Today! she is meeting one of her scrapbooking friends to go (window) shopping...

Why does everyday have to be a scrappy day?

As for today I suggest she buys nothing...


I guess it will be wishful thinking...

BubbaH!

Women & Technique...

REMINDER: I AM NOT NAMING ANYONE SO NO ONE SHOULD FEEL OFFENDED

Y'all know them: those women with those big SLR cameras around their necks snapping pictures of everything their kids do... Making like a million pics of their sprouts... And to make all those pics they have loads of memory cards... BUT WHAT DO THEY DO WHEN ALL THOSE CARDS ARE FULL???

They buy a picture tank! (for those of you who do not know: it's a portable harddisk with battery, card slots and... MOST IMPORTANT: 1 action button - IT'S MADE FOR WOMEN!!!)

And once they get home they hook it up to they PC and guess what... THEY DON'T KNOW HOW TO GET THE PICS OFF!!! and who are they gonna call??? ME!!! and who got that tank to work??? ME AGAIN!!! and who burned those pics on a DVD so they only have to copy them back to their PC??? OF COURSE ME AGAIN!!!

I just hope that they know how to use that dvd...
Women and technique... I guess it's just NOT DONE...

BubbaH!

Scrapper's Creed (or should I say GREED)

Here's a short list on (my view of) her creed's:

- Never leave home without at least one camera, every day is a potential photo opportunity.
- No scrap of paper bigger than the smallest punch shall be thrown away.
- Always be there for your fellow scrappettes to offer help, advise or support or just an ear for venting... But what about the husband?
- Gently remind your family (as they're frantically running from her & her camera) that they will thank you someday for the memories.
- Tolerate (my) your husband's comments as to the amount of money she spends. You may NOT point out that I have lots of tools, or the latest fishing, golf, boating, etc. accessory known to mankind.
- Do not envy your neighbor's Silhouette, alphabet punches, doodlecutter, etc. (at least not openly).
- Plan all family vacations to places that have at least one Local Scrapbooking Store.
- Always have at least one album in prominent view at all times should company just happen to drop by.
- Faithfully measure your paper stash and run, not walk, to LSS when pile dips below 6".
- Do not show your (and my) children the floor plan she has to convert their room for scrapping until they get kicked out of the house.
- Take at least one picture of yourself weekly so that my grandchildren will know you really was young once.
- Be forever thankful to Mr. Kodak for his wonderful invention.
- When (I) your husband is old and gray and reminiscing through your scrapbooks you will refrain from saying "I told you you would appreciate my obsession someday." Then you'll snap off some pics of (me) him in (my) his rocker!

And about that grey...

Have a great weekend!

BubbaH!

Keep her sharp!

She is doing some scrapping in her Scrap-room when I walked in and I immediately started yelling:

CAREFUL! CAREFUL! MORE GLUE! SHIFT IT UP! TURN! TURN! MORE GLUE! MORE RIBBON! GLUE, MORE GLUE! CAN'T YOU SEE THAT? YOU'RE GONNA SPILL! TURN! TURN! MORE GLUE! HURRY! HURRY! TURN! TURN! NOW! TOO MUCH GLUE! TOLD YOU SO! TURN! WAY TOO MUCH GLUE! MORE RIBBON! YOU'RE USING TOO FEW RIBBON! AND TOO FEW EMBELLISHMENTS! AND TOO FEW RUB-ONS!.....

She doesn't know what is happening and yells back: "Why are you yelling at me? What's the matter with you?"

I turn around as I walk from her scrap-room and calmly explain her: "Just to make clear how it feels you seated beside me while I am driving the car".

BUBBAHAHAHAHAHAHA

HOLY DAY!

As you can see, I am off to a well deserved holiday! All this scrapping is making me very tired... And I do not even do the scrapping myself! Just the thought of 2 weeks NO SCRAPPING makes me happy... (wonder what she thinks???) Maybe expanding to Turkye??? Multinational???

And the kids? Well, one of them is having his own blog... "Me & My Camera" about the way he sees life through his camera (and boy does he see a lot...), guess he'll be taking lotta pictures! Check it out HERE!!! The other one will probably just have a blast from start to finish...

See y'all in 2 weeks... If you got any good gossip... POST IT!!!

Bubbaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

TIP: If you camera breaks down...

TRY THE XEROX!!!

Oh and to keep y'all busy! Try this barcode...
Want one for you??? HERE!!!

Success comes in all shapes and colors...

I stumbeled upon this one and immediately it made me think of the way Elsie Flanagan looks on EVERY picture??? Is it her trademark or does she just look that way all the time... Think I'll have to ask her "hubby".

Luckely she's a babe... can you otherwise image these pictures???

BubbaH!

Showing off @ 2 peas

Every time one of them made a layout that is "so different" from the rest, they upload them to 2 peas in a pod to show off (or as they would say: hope for positive comments)...

WELL... LET ME SHOW YOU THEIR COMPETITION!!!!

And? Are you still wondering what others might think of her work?

Have a sunny weekend, 'cause you know: they ain't scrapping outside as the wind would take off with their creations... THAT"S WHAT I CALL SCRAPLIFTING!!!

BubbaHAHAHAHAH

BTW: It helps to complain about the weather... Friday the 13th is starting grey, but turns for the better with lots of sunshine this weekend!!!

simple life...

Have you ever wondered why me and her are that much different? Below is a picture to clarify the list about me... I didn't even start on on the list for her!!!

MAN: Simple creatures - simple rules.

My last name stays.
The garage is all mine. (After she cleaned it)...
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
I can be Prime Minister.
I can never get pregnant.
I can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
I can wear NO shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell me the truth.
I know stuff about cars.
I don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
I never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just "too icky".
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
Gray hairs make me look distinguished.
Wedding dress costs €5000; Tuxido rental only €100.
People never stare at my chest when I'm talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle my feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over within 30 seconds.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
I can open all my own jars.
I get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite me, he or she can still be your friend.
My underwear is €8.95 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
I almost never have strap problems in public.
I am unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on my face stays its original color.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
I only have to shave my face and nostrils.
I can play with toys all my life.
My belly usually hides my big hips.
One wallet and one pair of shoes: one color for all seasons.
I can wear shorts no matter how my legs look.
I can "do" my nails with a pocket knife.
I have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache..
I can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

Now you know: No wonder men are happier.

BubbaH!

BTW: remember I told you about my holidays starting with nothing but rain... IT STILL DOES!

DT Weekend

So another weekend another DT meeting... Ever had 13 women packed in one livingroom? Care to know where I am going to be? NOT AT HOME!!!


I needed an excuse, and one was handed to me: A birthday party!!! Yes, she will have me go alone, excusing herself and feeling guilty!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!

AND HOLIDAYS STARTS RIGHT NOW... Supposely SUMMER HOLIDAYS, but it looks more like AUTUMN LEAVES!!! For me and the boys that means showers, grey skies and lots of wind to blow leaves around; For her that means new books, stamps and loads of paper!

Did I mention there are NO more scrapbook supplies in my living room??? Everything found it's place in the scraproom... And if there was no space I hung up a shelf!!!

Nevertheless I know I am going to have a nice weekend.

BubbaaaaaaaaaaH!

Keep 'em happy

I bet y'all thought I was leaving you without an entry for the weekend... Just keeping you on your toes! Nah, I was very busy yesterday... Had to straighten some stuff out at the boys' school (yes both of them are now going to school!!!)... and work of course, which took a bit more effort then usual as it was month's ending! After that had a quick bite at home and left for "GUYS NIGHT".

Every other friday my friend Sven invites me and a couple of others to do MEN'S STUFF at his place... It is just about the same as cropping, but rather than discussing the latest in paper, we discuss the really important things in live: iPhone's, music, computers, latest DVD's, websites and so on...



So now you know why, here is something to keep your wife off your back (it makes you look like you are considerating her and her hobby, but the reversed side is ALL FOR YOU)...


Have a great weekend!

BubbaH!